While listening to a song that reminded me of Wife-unit recently I realised something. If you have a song or a movie or a novel that you want me to like, (and since securing my critical opinion is so crucial for chart success these days I can’t imagine why you haven’t considered this already) then you need only do one thing to guarantee success.

Well by one I mean two.

Either make your song/movie/novel/comicbook/fireplace mosaic about the love a father has for a son or the sincere love that a man has for his wife.

I suppose this is because I have been very heavily influenced by my dad and my wife. I’ve got a funny biography like that.

Now if you really actually want me to like you, as against merely sobbing uncontrollably on the train as I finish your novel, then you can explain to me in a non-ghey way how this deep yearning I have for stories like this relates to God my Father and Jesus the Bridegroom.

Your Correspondent, Just one of those average people who thinks he isn’t.